I am a loser

I've done something stupid and unforgivable
I've hurt someone badly
and I'm feeling guilty-sorrow.
I don't know if it was out of lonliness or the
flaw in me where I can't say no.

A mistake I am learning from
one mental scar that will never fade even with time
of all the things I hate in people, I hate in myself.
I should've listened to the first warnings, feelings
what I was warned not to do.
I learn, I'm learning.

I guess this is the price I will pay.
I don't know if it is grief, or rage
I can't say I am suffering, its more about
how sorry I am and I will never be able to prove it, show it, feel it.

I wish I was evil, so I wouldn't care or it wouldn't bother me.

I say no in my head, I say no
I never act on... NO.
Just to make others happy...

so yeah, emo Teni. stupid Teni

How dare Teni complain.

well if the septic tank hit a fucking turbine

I won't ask why anymore.

I've also smashed that small violin long ago.
I have not complained once when people told me their woes, because I know if it came to me, I want people to lend an ear once a while.

Everyone makes mistakes.
I'm trying to believe this.

i dont believe it

so i was asked again to draw something- ya know a request?well i'm flooded with things like that- and i have art trades i have to owe-- yupso jokingly i saidif i get paid $5 for requests--- then HECK YEAH D:I was told-- yeah they'd pay. so i'm like .... crazy enough for commissions? ok D: my prices are low- and its a half and half thing- i'll have more details laterthis is not a sure set thing yet.. just an idea and idea X_x nothing is set up yet but these be my standards D:but i cant do commisions until i finish my art trades --- ----------------------------------------if you want- you can always chose the pose of a character/smy art style is a mix of anime & western-ish ness[]1 full body character drawn with a backshot background of said character's torso is $5example of a backshot background --> http://www.deviantart.com/view/35182775/[]1 full body character bust is $2 (with choice of color background)[] full body character (one character) sheets are $10 with 4 poses ( you know, front back 3/4th's and side view )[]full body character (one character) sheets with accessories & 4 poses $ facial expressions are $25[]2 character busts is $5 (like the torso shot of a momma holding her baby) [] 1 full body character with choice of background is $7* I can also draw hentai & yaoi & yuri ( straight porn, gay porn, lesbian or random nudes)[]all porn things are $8 ONLY 2 CHARACTERS no backgrounds (choose the posing/ act & whatever is going on )[]random nudes 1 fully body character (you know the artistic kind of nude) will be $5 -----------------------------------------------------------GIVE FULL DETAILS- (for each character)
Name of Character:
Name of owner of Character:
body shape:
pose of character:
facial expression:
Age:
skin color:
eye color:
hair color:
hair style:
scars?:
earings?:
markings on skin?:
jewelry?:
clothing(full details here):
(if it applies) Background?:
any pets?:
weapons?:
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this is just an idea... i'm going for-- i dont know about it-- it depends on who wants ithalf and half.. all the of the above will have full shading & stuff. @_@just an idea....